I'd like to have a relationship like that with a bank so I could get 64 dollars and only have to "fortify" the bank with 12 or 18 dollars in return.
That is a good analogy. It reminds me of a story (everything reminds me of a story) A while ago I was in a store, a women's store because my wife was not feeling well and I had to return something. It was also in a Mall, and I don't do Malls. I get that mall look as soon as I walk in so I try to run out as fast as I can. Anyway there were about 3 women on line so I assumed it wouldn't take long. Wrong. I mean 3 ladies, how long could it take?
So the first one goes up to the checkout girl and they start talking about kids, cellulite, the sizes on European clothes etc. That takes 10 minutes and she leaves. The next Lady knows the sales girl so they exchange E Mail addresses, look at each other's kid pictures, converse on when they went to grade school etc. After 10 or 15 minutes, she is finished and leaves. The next lady, after waiting in line for 20 minutes decides she wants a different color "thing" whatever she bought so we all wait while they go and look for this non existent item. They couldn't find it so they look in the store room, then call all the other stores in the area. I am standing there getting a heart attack and a nervous breakdown, probably also growing ingrown toenails. Finally, after seemingly a weekend, she leaves with out buying anything so it is my turn. I just want to return this thing. She wants to know what is wrong with it. How do I know? I don't even know what it is, just take it back, I don't even need my money back, just get me out of here. She gives me a nasty look, probably because I didn't want to see a picture of her kid, or dog.
I get to leave and go have a drink. How do you women shop? Like, don't you have other things to do than wait in line all day?
There should be a Man store strictly for Men. And only real Men should be allowed to go. I mean, maybe they need to give you a Man card or tattoo a bar code on your arm, next to a battle ship or cro bar. In a Man store there would only be Supermodels working there, but they don't have to do anything but point. I would walk in and say something like "Where do you keep your chain saws", and she would point to the place.
The price would be clearly marked on the thing in wide magic marker including the tax and anything else they want to charge me. But the price should be rounded off to the nearest dollar. No change because change is for Sissies and Girly men, (who shouldn't be allowed in the store anyway) Then the Supermodel would point to the door where there is a bucket. You throw approximately the amount of your purchase into the bucket and leave to go use your chain saw. Sometimes you would throw in a little more, sometimes a little less, but at the end of the year, it will all work out. You wouldn't need silly accounts to figure out every penny and no need to carry change to the bank.
