Funniest LFS statement you ever heard?

RareEarthCorals · Aug 23, 2015

Today I decide to cruise up to a local LFS Ive never been to, and Ive thought Ive heard it all until today...

Me: Do you have Nutrisea Water for sale.
LFS: What animal is that?
Me: Its sea water in a jug for reef systems, fish!!!
LFS: You mean its water?
Me: Yes its water

LFS: We have saltwater.
Me:

dropped everything on the counter, Started laughing, and walked out.

If it didnt happen, I wouldnt of believed it. You have a store that has saltwater animals and supplies and you question what seawater is, water??
Time to revisit a new career that doesnt involve the salt water hobby...

Humblefish · Aug 23, 2015

Me: "No offense, but you seem to suffer a lot of losses/diseases with your fish shipments."
LFS: "It happens. You have to put your trust in the wholesaler."
Me: "Maybe it's time to try a different wholesaler."
LFS: "You don't understand. It's all about building a relationship with your wholesaler."
Me: "Seems to me you're in an abusive relationship."

veselym · Aug 23, 2015

Me: Do you have any 2 part calcium in stock, need to start dosing
LFS: no, what is your calcium level at? If you keep it around 9 like most salt mixes have you are fine with just changing water
Me: you mean a level of 9 Alkalinity?
LFS: No, we keep all of our tanks calcium at 9
Me: I chuckled under my breath and walked out, geesh

steve&mari · Aug 23, 2015

veselym said:
Me: Do you have any 2 part calcium in stock, need to start dosing
LFS: no, what is your calcium level at? If you keep it around 9 like most salt mixes have you are fine with just changing water
Me: you mean a level of 9 Alkalinity?
LFS: No, we keep all of our tanks calcium at 9
Me: I chuckled under my breath and walked out, geesh

That's too funny but sad at the same time. Luckily the lfs I go to has better informed staff.

veselym · Aug 23, 2015

I knew he was confused but refused to inform him of DKH levels...I just left it

I should have known as they don't sell a lot of SW livestock but figured I would try

ritter6788 · Aug 23, 2015

Wife (looking at a carnation coral): oh, I like that one.

Me: no, those are non-photosynthetic and impossible to keep alive.

Store OWNER walks up: What lights do you have?

Me: 150w MH

Store owner: oh yeah...those lights are perfect for this coral. We grow it here all the time. Cut off a branch an stick it in a hole and it takes off. Grows like a weed.

Me: 'gets waders because the bull is getting deep'

FDAWG · Aug 23, 2015

Yeah, Of coarse it's reef safe. It won't eat your Zoas.

ca2or · Aug 24, 2015

"Everyone coppers their tanks"
Me: but it's a reef tank
"Haven't you seen the artificial reefs?"
Me: come on babe let's go

Test led · Aug 24, 2015

Me: you have a lot of aptasia in your tanks.
LFS: No, those are glass anemones and they are 40.00 a piece.
Me: You are trying to sell aptasia to customers? You know it isn't a good thing right?
LFS: No they are glass anemones and really hard to get.
I just walked out.

ca2or · Aug 24, 2015

Test led said:
Me: you have a lot of aptasia in your tanks.
LFS: No, those are glass anemones and they are 40.00 a piece.
Me: You are trying to sell aptasia to customers? You know it isn't a good thing right?
LFS: No they are glass anemones and really hard to get.
I just walked out.

Very first "coral" I ever bought was a rock the size of a nerf football. Dude said they were rock anemone's....turns out they were mojano's.

thehammer1985 · Aug 24, 2015

ca2or said:
Very first "coral" I ever bought was a rock the size of a nerf football. Dude said they were rock anemone's....turns out they were mojano's.

Hahaha dude I couldn't stop laughing when I read this thank you for that

lysaer · Aug 24, 2015

Me: "I'm thinking about setting up my 55g tank as saltwater. What do I need to do first?"
LFS: "You can't have a saltwater tank in anything less than 200 gallons, so you're going to need a new stand, and tank, and canopy.."

ca2or · Aug 24, 2015

thehammer1985 said:
Hahaha dude I couldn't stop laughing when I read this thank you for that

Looking back at it yeah it was kind of funny. I fought those mojanos for the following 8 years. By the time I learned what they were almost a year had gone by and they were everywhere. They even started getting color to a point that some were actually nice to look at

Justinky · Aug 24, 2015

Dude sold my older brother a shroom that had bubble algae on it the size of quarters and said "look you get two for the price of one".

He now won't go to a LFS and buy if they have bubble algae in their tanks.

thehammer1985 · Aug 24, 2015

ca2or said:
Looking back at it yeah it was kind of funny. I fought those mojanos for the following 8 years. By the time I learned what they were almost a year had gone by and they were everywhere. They even started getting color to a point that some were actually nice to look at

I believe it I thought they where mind bta when I first started so I could see this happening . I'd go back there and kidney punch that guy who sold it

FishLipz · Aug 24, 2015

Said about a powder blue tang...."Oh no! That isn't ich, its just sand stuck to him because they sleep there."

Mattyice008 · Aug 24, 2015

Overheard an associate talk to an elderly couple about some black ice clowns that were pretty pricey

Associate: yea so you can't just have one of them, you have to buy 2 or more, its impossible to keep one alive by itself for too long.

reef4beer · Aug 24, 2015

lol these are pretty good, wish my memory was good enough to remember all the bs i've heard.

steve&mari · Aug 24, 2015

lysaer said:
Me: "I'm thinking about setting up my 55g tank as saltwater. What do I need to do first?"
LFS: "You can't have a saltwater tank in anything less than 200 gallons, so you're going to need a new stand, and tank, and canopy.."

That's a future used car salesman there lol. Maybe he just wanted to avoid the eventual upgrades save time and money

. Lol

Dextereef · Aug 24, 2015

Overheard this at an LFS....owner to customer.

Customer: I want to get a hippo tang.
LFS: Awesome, how many?
Customer: I think just one
LFS: What size tank do you have?
Customer: I just setup a 220g
LFS: Oh you can put as many as you want in that tank...You should go with 5 so they wont kill each other...odd numbers are the key.
Customer: I can put that many in at once
LFS: Yup no problem
ME:

Heard from another LFS that the customer came in complaining that all his hippos were dead....